Because He's Got Dickie Davies' Eyes

More idiots:

The January 2005 issue of U.S. Catholic features an article on the names being given to children in the United States and reports that recent years have seen kids named Lexus, Chanel, Armani, Cartier, and Espn (after the sports channel ESPN and presumably pronounced Espen).

In a separate Feedback section on memorable stories behind kids' names, one chap recounts that

“A couple we knew were expecting their eighth child, a boy. No problem. He was to be named Henry (the eighth).”

Mm. No doubt you had the same thoughts I did. Presumably this couple is not Catholic, otherwise Henry VIII is a most unlikely figure to name your child after. And what's more, why aren't the previous seven kids called Henry too, after Henrys 1 through 7? Unless they're all girls, where's the logic in this decision?

Morons. I swear, the world is full of morons. No wonder they need a tower.