Thursday, February 01, 2007

Multiple Choice Would Be Harder

Having made an unnecessary trip into Mcr last night (note to self: check listings before you leave the house), I decided to catch the last 15 mins of Arse/Totty in a boozer in Alty that I don't normally frequent. I might go every Weds. from now on as they appear to have the world's easiest pub quiz and the nation's thickest quiz teams. Whilst getting served I overheard

Quizmaster: Who led the coalition Government formed in 1940?

Lad 1: Er . . . Maggie Thatcher.


Quizmaster: Which port is the capital of Argentina?

Lad 2: Brazil?

To be fair, the two lads at the bar weren't taking it too seriously but, god, they were clueless.

What I found slightly odd was when the quizmaster followed the question "Which woman has this week announced that she will be running for President of the United States?" with the comment, "Not while I've a breath in my body!"

Now, while he may well have legitimate reasons to dislike Hillary Clinton and her policies (when she gets around to announcing them), the bloke, who has no vote in the U.S. elections as far I know, was implying that he would resort to illegal methods to prevent her election. Should I call the anti-terrorist unit?


John said...

With a bit of luck maybe he just meant he'll top himself on Election Night.

Come on, Mart, name names. Which pub was it? Or should we have a competition to guess?

I reckon it was the Malt Shovels.

John said...

btw, Arse Totty sounds like a fun movie. Was it any good?

Martin said...

The Malt is Sunday's boozer.Market Dave permitting.

The Totty weren't up to much.

Good Arse though

John said...

What does Market Dave do that prevents the Malt from being Sunday's boozer?

Is it the obvious?

Martin said...


John said...

After how many pints? Are they too scared to bar him?

John said...

Can I have another guess?

The Station. They were always tards in there.

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Unknown said...

My money is on the pub which is part of a chain, stands on a corner and is named after a mythological equine-ish creature.
That's just because it's Alty's first and foremost Arse-Totty mine, at least whilst I was there.

I would call the anti-terrorist unit, in fact I'm already writing a new series of "24" where Jack Bauer commutes between Salford and Cheshire to save president H. Clinton from the evil quizmaster!

Reidski said...

Talkin of Manchester pubs - I like the wee tiny place, don't know the name of it, but it's a former public toilet and there's only enough room in it for about three people.
Also remember watching a United v Newcastle game in some huge fucking pub one Saturday lunchtime - again, don't know the name of it.

Fuck, I'll get my coat ...

Martin said...

Stef-You do realise I was talking about football (ArsenalvsSpurs) don't you.And no not The 'Corn wrong end of town.

Reidski- That'll be the bogs on Oxford Road.Was the United pub The Trafford Arms as not seen on Life On Mars .

John said...

Maybe Stef meant the Griffin in Bowdon. Okay, it's not horse-like, but it used to be full of the Goldplated crowd; Wilmslow ghetto gold.


A former public toilet in Manchester that only holds three people. Are you sure you want to tell us about this?

John said...


My thinking was that it had to be a pub on the way hoe from the train station. Hence, the Timperley end of town. Unless he was taking a detour.

Martin said...

Or so desperate for a pint I got off at Navvy Road.

Reidski said...

John, it was the rather dodgy looking young bloke outside who told me it was a former public toilet. And he invited me in cos he said he was having a drink with a couple of friends. Now that I think about it, £20 for a can of Special Brew, particularly as he insisted on fumbling in my pockets for about five minutes looking for the money in coins ... and the people on the next table/cubicle were making lots of noises too!!

John said...

Ah yes. I used to be a regular in there.

Martin said...

What are the bogs like?

Unknown said...

Sure if you're checkin' out Arse and Totty you're after a bit of meat?
(she says, in a v v v ladylike manner)

I think the public toilet is the one on oxford road, where if you sit at the right table you can see right into the Ladies' (real) toilets.
Good for the experience, really, if you want to say "I drank in a toilet once" and feel proud. Decent beer and good juke box though.

John said...


You perv.